Having a carpet on your chest, a rainforest on your back, and a biohazard zone under your arms doesn’t make you a wilderness survivalist. What it does is make you hot, uncomfortable, and in need of manscaping.
As Wolverine famously proved, having a bit of fuzz can look ruggedly iconic, but even Logan keeps it trimmed so it doesn’t look like a pair of rogue squirrels nesting on his chest.
To be honest, manscaping isn’t about scrubbing away your masculinity. It is more about looking and feeling clean and put together. If you are worried about how, here’s a checklist for you.
Start with Pre-grooming!
Before you jump straight in like Bruce Wayne getting into his batsuit, follow these three golden rules of safe grooming.
- Going ham with your trimming session on dry skin is a sure shot way to cause micro-tears and red bumps all over. So, first things first, NEVER GO IN DRY.
- Exfoliation solves half the problem. A thorough exfoliation session with a mild body scrub about 24 hours before shaving will lift your flat-lying hair and remove dead skin cells.
- The right tools will stay with you for a long time. So, get a good Trimmer for Men with skin-safe blades.
Subject 1: THE CHEST!
Grooming your chest hair comes with a lot of side-eyes and confusion. Here’s the main question: Do you want full Captain America smooth, or a classic 1970s Sean Connery aesthetic? Either way, control and precision are key.
4 simple steps- that’s all you need to clean your canvas:
1. Trim first and shave later (if needed)
Do you take your wet razor straight into your chest hair and then wonder why it clogs every three seconds? You need a good-quality multi-grooming trimmer and knock the length down to a 3mm or 5mm guard setting.
2. Define the boundaries
Not just in your relationships, setting and defining boundaries is equally important for your grooming routine.
You need to start with your neckline and keep it clean. Your chest hair shouldn’t blend seamlessly with your beard unless you want to look like a Chewbacca action figure. So, stop the trim right at the collarbone.
3. Go with the grain
For a smooth relationship, you and your partner must walk in the same direction – HAND in HAND. Similarly, for a smooth shave, your razor should go with your hair growth.
If you don’t want to deal with ingrown hairs, this step is mandatory. Don’t skip out on it.
4. Soothe the skin
After you finish trimming (or shaving) your chest hair, finish the routine with an alcohol-free, cooling post-shave balm or cream. This will instantly lock in moisture and calm irritation.
Subject 2: THE BACK
As Chandler Bing once implied, back hair is strictly for target practice, not display. However, here’s the challenge. Unless you are flexible enough to join Cirque du Soleil, reaching your upper and lower back solo is practically impossible.
Here are a few workaround tips for you:
1. Call in some reinforcements
Have a partner or a trusted roommate with you? Now is the time to test the strength of your bond. “For better or for worse,” cash in on those vows now!
If you are solo, you can get your hands on an ergonomic back-grooming handle attachment with a reliable Hair Cutting Trimmer attachment.
2. Top to bottom
This is where you start the grooming. Start from the shoulders and move downwards. The key is to move in deliberate, short strokes instead of frantic sweeps. Seriously, SLOW DOWN! Why are you rushing?
3. Zero in on the shoulders
The shoulders and rear delts often get missed. So, here’s your reminder to stop and pay close attention. Double-check in a full-length mirror or use a handheld mirror to make sure no patches are left behind.
4. Rinse cold
After you finish grooming your chest or back, finish with a cold or lukewarm shower. This will close your pores and reduce the risk of back acne (aka the wretched bacne).
Subject 3: THE UNDERARMS
Well, we have arrived at our PIT STOP – LITERALLY!
While chest and back hair grooming can be attributed to aesthetics alone, the science behind underarm grooming is completely different. It is more about HYGIENE.
Less hair = Less sweat buildup = Less bacterial growth = Less body odour. LHS = RHS, if you will.
As Harvey Dent said, “You either die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain,” and nobody wants to be the odour villain in an enclosed elevator.
4 steps again, so follow along:
- Don’t go completely bare (unless you want to) since it can cause uncomfortable skin-on-skin friction. A good alternative is a neat trim using a 2mm or 3mm guard. This is enough to keep things hygienic.
- Loose skin folds will make your grooming difficult (and often unsafe). So, here’s the mantra you need: LIFT and STRETCH. A simple way to do that is by raising your arm high behind your head to pull your skin taut. Then, let your trimmer do the rest.
- Your alcohol deodorant is your biggest enemy, TBH! Heavy chemical deo or alcohol-based sprays dry out the skin even more. Wait a few hours or stick to an all-natural, soothing roll-on.
Don’t Skip Out on the Aftercare
Would you buy an expensive and sleek sports car and forget to polish it? You shouldn’t start your grooming session without prioritising aftercare.
Steps are simple, here are a few:
- An exfoliating body wash with salicylic acid or tea tree oil is a great option. It keeps your hair follicles clean and helps prevent bumps.
- Moisturisation is a must. Hydrated skin supports softer regrowth and helps keep itchiness in check, which is common 48 hours after your trim.
- Last but not the least, CLEAN YOUR TRIMMER. AFTER EVERY SESSION. This removes excess beard hair and keeps the blade sharp longer.
Shift Your Focus Away from the Face!
Painful and complicated shouldn’t be part of your grooming experience, no matter the location. So, the next time you plan to shave or groom your chest, back, or underarms, these tips should come in handy.
The takeaway is simple: Confidence isn’t necessarily about having less body hair; it’s more about being comfortable in your own skin.
